12 September 2009

The Horror!

While I have plenty of stories to tell about my recent travel adventures to NYC and thoughts about life, I will entertain with a different story. I call it "Not MY Kid".

There are certain stories you hear over and over from parents whose kids are older than yours. As you listen, rocking back and forth, holding your swaddled bundle of goodness you think "Oh, that will never happen to me. Not MY child." Examples of these stories may include biting other children at daycare, throwing an all out tantrum in your favorite store or coloring with permanent marker on the walls. Or perhaps something like this....

Ring the bell. Marilyn answers the door.
"Oh, hi Neve." Yells down stairs, "JERRY! It's Rowan's mom."
Rowan comes running upstairs and roars as he grabs my legs.
Jerry peaks around Marilyn. "Did she tell you what this little urchin did today during nap? He was lucky I wasn't here."
"No. What?" Furrowed brow.
"He took off his pants, his shirt and his poopy diaper then played in it."
Blink. Blink. Thinking inside head (NOT MY CHILD.)
Marilyn pipes in, "I don't think he was too happy about it. He did not seem to like his choice. We got him cleaned up pretty good."
What?! "He takes off his clothes?"
"Oh, yeah. He always takes off his socks and pants during nap."
Humph! News to me. So glad we have been WORKING SO HARD ON DRESSING AT HOME.
"I guess it is time to potty train. Like it or not."
Mumble apologies and try to get out as quickly as possible. So glad I can join the official ranks of "Did you hear what so-and-so's child did?".

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